October 5, 2009

Day 31- Stage 2 of Intro - My Issues

So, I had a few issues today.  I hate to admit it, but it is true.  I was irritable.  Noise and talking and clutter really bothered me today.  As hard as I tried to look at things in a positive light and be positive, my words always came out sounding negative and irritable.  I wanted to point out every mistake or wrongdoing and I just could not seem to let things go.  It was mild compared to some days, but it was there.

I have enjoyed well over a week without any of these "overwhelmed", "stressed", "annoyed", "irritable" feelings.  It has been nice.  I can't figure out why I feel this way.  I got more sleep than I have been getting and I slept soundly.  I did NOT have any egg yolk, though I gave some to the kids yesterday.  I DID have some avocado last night, but I have never had an issue with avocado before.  I DID go to the Whole Foods store yesterday.  I do not like being this way, even just a little bit, which is why I have been so good about sticking to the Feingold diet for the past 3-4 years.

I say it was mild because I held it together for the most part and didn't lose my temper with anyone today.  I stayed on top of all of the cooking and laundry and, well, just everything that had to get done today.  We had 3 sets of blankets and bedsheets to wash in addition to 2 regular loads of laundry.  We did not get it all done, which means more laundry for tomorrow, but I'm cool with it.  We had one peepee accident in the bathroom, so the bathroom floor had to be sanitized, but I stayed cool.  I know it was truly an accident.  We had one poopy fall out of a 2 year old's diaper in the middle of the living room floor, so he had to be changed and cleaned up and the floor had to be sanitized, but I still held it together.  The amount of pee and poo in this house as of late has been something to talk about.  Really!  We seem to talk about it all day long.

Our 8 year old was a tad bit irritable, but not too bad, just a little out of sorts.  Our 11 year old seems to have lost his mind, meaning that his memory is gone and if his head were not screwed on, he would lose it.  He had a hard time remembering what he was supposed to be doing and kept leaving things half done.  He couldn't give me a straight answer about anything.  He had a hard time remembering to be considerate of other people in the house and didn't answer loud enough for me to hear him whenever I asked him any questions, but I did not get upset because I remembered that this is the case when he is reacting to something.  He was dropping food all over the place.  It's crazy, but it is true that when he is reacting to something he can't move food from one place to another without dropping it, so we also notice that when he is reacting to something he puts his mouth down by his plate and shovels it in.  We have tried and tried to teach him to use a fork correctly and sometimes he can do it, but then he gets exposed to something and all of the work we put into teaching him to do it right seems to just go out the window.  He gets totally focused about one thing and talkes about it all day long whether you are interested in it or not and does not seem to notice whether it is an appropriate time to be talking or not.  I could go on, but I won't.  Our 5 year old did pretty good today.  The baby did great!  Our 2 year old did pretty good today with only a few issues, but nothing to holler home about.

I nearly burned the zucchini, but caught it just in time.  I didn't cook enough veggies to make the sauce for the casserole, but I started early, so I had time to cook more veggies and we had a late dinner.  The 3 chickens we cooked yesterday to last us for several days turned out to be tough and chewy, so we had to cut it up into tiny pieces.  We used it for soup and casserole.  I had to go to the grocery store to buy more chicken and I cooked it this afternoon.  We will debone it and strain the broth before going to bed.  I also still have to strain and bottle the fat I rendered this afternoon.  All in all I guess I was in a pretty good mood after all.  If I was able to accomplish as much as I did and deal with all of the stuff that came up throughout the day and not lose my temper with anyone in the house, then I guess I did pretty well after all.  I felt like a grump, but hey, don't we all from time to time?

(In reality, I was/am reacting to something.  I know this because I have learned that there are days when I simply cannot tune anything out and I get very overwhelmed by it all.  Today was one of those days and I did feel agitated by all of the input, but by the grace of God, I am learning to recognize this and so I do not now blame others for my problem.  When the children's chatter and talk used to overwhelm me, I used to blame them.  Now I tell them that I am unable to take it all in and sort it out.  I let them know that I am getting frustrated, but that it is not their fault.  I tell them that I am trying to listen, but that I cannot understand all of their words or make sense of what they are trying to tell me.  I ask them to try not to take my frustration personally.  I ask everyone to stop talking and I purpose to focus on one child and encourage them to speak clearly and to try to give me all the information I need to understand what they are trying to tell me.  I tell them that I am not good at trying to figure things out when I am feeling so overwhelmed, so they have to be very clear and upfront with me.  You see, some days they can all talk to me at once and it is no big deal.  I love those days!  I feel like a supermom.  Some days I just can't handle it at all.)

Enough of that!  Thank you God for this amazing day!  Thank you for helping me to get a proper perspective about my crazy day.  Thank you for your goodness and your amazing grace!


Fiji water with lemon

kraut juice

chicken broth


squash and carrots

chicken soup

leftover lamb stew

blended butternut squash 
(with broth and fat for the two year old)

butternut squash soup - blended with leftover broth from the hamburger soup (waste nothing)
We discovered that the butternut squash goes better with beef broth and fat, while the acorn squash and the sweet dumpling squash goes better with chicken broth and fat.

casseroles - made in those small rectangular loaf pans
We had two chicken and two beef casseroles.

cauliflower for the 5 year old and I - it seems that she had a tummy ache after eating the cauliflower, but no leg cramps noted so far.  She had a detox bath, so we may never know.  If I really want to test it, then I need to give it to her for lunch so she has time to develop the problem before we plop her in the bath.  I will try that tomorrow.

I plan to have fried eggs and a little avocado later tonight.

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